Arnie Goes to the Carnival

I wrote this script for a possible gig. They want to do short animated videos starring a muscle-bound airhead with a giant ego but a good heart. It was great to get back to script writing.  Prose fiction is fun, micro-fiction is super-fun but this is the most fun by a mile.

EXT. CARNIVAL - DAY
A beautiful sunny day at the carnival. Children run around, young couples stroll, parents drink sodas and eat pretzels... everyone's having a nice time.

SOUND EFFECT: BING!

CUT TO:

EXT. CARNIVAL - "TEST YOUR STRENGTH" BOOTH - CONTINUOUS
ARNIE, a giant, comically oversized muscle-bound man, smiles ear to ear, one hand majestically holding the hammer, the other side receiving his stuff animal prize from the tired, old BOOTH ATTENDANT.

Arnie hands the prize over to JENNY, his date, a cute girl (maybe even a little artsy/dorky). She adds them to an already overwhelming armload of prizes. She looks bored.

ARNIE: Again!

He hands the Booth Attendant a dollar bill, raises the hammer and slams it down, sending the sliding weight up the pole and ringing the bell again.

SOUND EFFECT: BING!

Again, the Attendant hands Arnie a prize and Arnie hands it over to Jenny increasing her ridiculous pile of gifts.

ARNIE: Again!

He hands the Booth Attendant another dollar, raises the hammer, ready to strike.

JENNY: Are you bored?

ARNIE: No! I could do this all day!

Arnie gestures grandly, showing off his muscles and SLAMS the hammer down. This time it's so hard the sliding weight goes up the pole, knocks the bell off and flies straight up into the sky, out of frame.

BOOTH ATTENDANT: You broke it!

ARNIE: Does that mean I win all the prizes?

Jenny sees an opportunity and takes it!

JENNY: Yes! It does! He'll hold them for you.

Jenny dumps the load of prizes into the Booth Attendant's arms, takes Arnie's hand and leads him off. The poor Booth Attendant is left confused.

Beat.

The sliding weight falls from the sky, hits the Booth Attendant in the head, knocking him out and sending the prizes flying everywhere.

EXT. CARNIVAL - FUN HOUSE MIRRORS - LATER
There are three big, full length mirrors. One of them makes everyone look skinny, one fat and one normal.

A MOTHER stands in front of the mirrors with her little TODDLER. She's tossing him up and down. He's giggling.

Armie and Jenny walk by them, eating cotton candy.

JENNY: That looks like fun.

ARNIE: Let's help him have more fun.

Arnie walks over to the Mother and confidently takes the toddler, as if he's happily doing them a favor they asked for. They look at him too confused to say anything (which he probably interprets as them thinking he's awesome).

ARNIE: Let's catch some air big guy! One!

Arnie tosses the toddler in the air and catches him.

ARNIE: Two!

Arnie tosses the toddler again, this time much, much higher but the child comes down, he catches him.

ARNIE: And three!

This time Arnie tosses the toddler so high he goes out of the frame. The Mother looks horrified! And so does Arnie!

Then we realize Arnie is horrified not for the child's safety but because he's caught his own reflection in the "fat" mirror.

ARNIE: I knew I should have done more cardio if I was going to be eating cotton candy! I'm fat and hideous!

Arnie breaks out into an exercise routine: jumping jacks, push ups, squat thrusts and so on. Of course, he's completely oblivious to the bigger issue at hand.

Meanwhile, the Mother runs back and forth with her arms out, looking up at the sky, trying to judge where her son's going to land. This continues in the background throughout the next exchange.

JENNY: You're not fat.

ARNIE: (between push ups) Thanks... but... that... doesn't... make... me... feel... better.

JENNY: No, you're literally not fat. It's a fun house mirror.

Arnie stops, gets up and looks at the mirror. He's fat. He steps to the thin mirror, now he's scrawny. Back to the fat mirror, he's fat again.

ARNIE: Oh. That's not fun.

Finally he steps in front of the third, normal mirror. He likes what he sees and bursts into a big grin then breaks out into a series of bodybuilder poses.

ARNIE: This is a fun mirror!

In the background the child finally falls from the sky and the Mother barely catches him! They are very, very relieved.

Arnie continues posing. Jenny rolls her eyes.

CUT TO:

EXT. CARNIVAL - FUN HOUSE MIRRORS - NIGHT
The carnival has shut down but Arnie is still posing into the mirror, oblivious to anything else around him. He's having a blast!

A JANITOR sweeps up around Arnie. Finally, he taps Arnie on the shoulder, breaking the spell of the reflection.

JANITOR: Sorry, sir, but we're closed.

ARNIE: We must have lost track of time. My lady and I were having fun with the mirror. See?

Arnie breaks out into poses again. The Janitor looks around for the supposed "lady."

JANITOR:  There's no one else here.

But it's too late. Arnie's lost in his own reflection. Again. The Janitor shakes his head, giving up on Arnie and keeps sweeping.

END.